Sunflowers N Sunshine

Saturday, April 02, 2005

here i am hours later.
not much difference from when i started off.
who am i kidding.
none at all.
songs keep running through my head.
i can't focus.
i can't seem to string words to form sentences.
and then sentences to form paragraphs.
and so on.
but the irony of it all is
i hold the key.
the solution to my own problems.
the answer to all my questions.
then why do i keep asking others?
in reality,
who knows better than me
about myself...
only one.

it is official. i am going crazy. i keep my sentences short. i do not want to confuse myself. i am not really crazy. just too bored. yes that is right. actually i have quite a few things to do. wash the dishes. tidy the table. WRITE MY ESSAY. yet i somehow feel that when the date due comes around on monday at 5pm, i will be fine. why? i do not understand myself. the week whizzed by. where is the easter break i was looking forward to? where i planned so many things. i did some of them. but hardly many. i keep complaining. that's no use. get up. get about. why don't you do something? maybe i should just sleep. wake up. get to work. come home. then i have no choice but to do my due-the-next-day essay. i will get through this. i sound depressed don't i. but do not be fooled. i am not really. i am even smiling. i am bored. so bored. too bored. it is saturday night! essay essay essay essay essay. i have realised that for someone who has been in melb for a year and a hal, i have not seen much. but there is nothing much i wanna see. done mornington. torquay*awesome. random cafes and places which due to my bad-old-lady memory cannot remember. the trillion and one oh-so-good-must-try dessert/coffee/food places. which i do not recall the names either. zoo. horse-riding @ a don't-recall location, along the beach and through the bushes. cycling around random suburbs. gardens 1 2 and 3. oh but one place i wanna go is brighton beach to see the colourful box thingamagics.... i so have to post a pic...gonna find one now now now! see how fast i work when i want to*tsk tsk*.back. googled it. success. ok gonna rest. close eyes. breathe easy. and sleep.
i am not crazy. remember. just bored.

because i said so! Nadz at
2:44 PM